Wishing I Was Here...

Anyone who has taken even the most casual of glances at this blog knows that my escape destination of choice is the island of Anguilla in the British West Indies. I had always planned to travel to lots of different islands and write about my various experiences here on this site, but I fell utterly and head-over-heels in love with the very first island I visited, and have not yet been able to pull myself away from it.

As is the case with many people these days, this past year has been one of the tougher ones for me financially, and as you might imagine, island-hopping is not exactly a cheap hobby. So, I wasn’t able to travel as much as I would’ve liked. However, I now find myself fortunate enough to be able to plan another trip, and I really see no other option but to get myself back to my favorite island and the beautiful people there who have flattered me by making me feel missed.

So, it’s official: I’ll be heading back to Anguilla (AXA) in early 2012!

One of the benefits of being a frequent visitor to Anguilla is that I feel like I know the “secrets” of how to vacation there on… let’s call it a “frugal” budget.  Now, I love staying at fabulous resorts and getting pampered as much as anyone else (as I enjoyed on my first AXA trip), but at least when it comes to Anguilla, I’m willing to sacrifice the “posh” if it means I get to visit more often.

So, once again, I find myself making my way back to my happy place.  I know that there are many who are just barely getting by and many more not even able to do that, so I fully recognize how fortunate I am. I’m lucky, I know it, and I don’t plan on taking it for granted.

Stay tuned to islandObsessions.com and my tweets at http://www.twitter.com/caribOrBust to see how plans for this trip come together!

Ohhh, but the poor guy really had no idea what he was getting in to, did he?  You see, when you ask someone who is completely obsessed with Anguilla about what can’t be missed when visiting the island, you had better prepare yourself for a deluge of information. So, yeah…he couldn’t get me to shut up.

(Sorry Steve!)

Understandably, he could only pick and choose a few of my many suggestions to put in the blog post he was writing, but I don’t think that new visitors selecting from among them would be at all disappointed.  So, take yourself over to UC and check out a few of my must-dos when visiting Anguilla at UncommonCaribbean.com!

I’m sure that other members of the Anguilla faithful might have a different set of AXA must-do’s, so be sure to comment and let us know what they are!

I recently returned home from my absolutely fabulous 5th trip to Anguilla during which I had a fantastic time visiting friends and exploring more of the island. I only wish I could have stayed longer and, I know this makes me sound like a spoiled you-know-what, but this trip of 6 nights in Anguilla was WAY too short! I’m not sure I’ll be able to do an AXA trip that lasts less than 10 days ever again! Go ahead, you can hate me now. (Sorry, but you already knew this island thing is a bit of an addiction for me, right?) So, I’ll just have to save up for a longer trip next time.

As usual, in the short period that I’ve been back, the differences between that little island and home have been glaringly obvious. It always happens that way – I get back, I desperately long for all the things I’m missing from Anguilla, and then the memory of what it’s like to be there gradually fades as I get back into the “daily grind”.

Granted, some of those things that I love about being in Anguilla are simply the benefits of being on vacation: no set schedule, no one to take care of but myself, and the complete freedom to do anything or nothing at all.

But, what I tend to miss most about Anguilla are those things that are so distinctly different from life at home and that I won’t likely experience until I head back again. So, before my current “island high” wears off completely, I thought I should write down some of those things that keep me coming back to AXA time and time again:

1. The slower pace of island life

This natural and relaxed pace is likely an unavoidable result of the fact that quite a lot of AXA runs on island time, which is that casual “Don’t worry, it’ll get done sooner or later” laid-back attitude common to the islands.

For me, life at home consists of zipping around from one appointment to the next almost non-stop with barely enough time to sleep at night.  Getting things done in a timely manner is key at all times; slow down and you get left behind.

So when I step foot on Anguilla, you can imagine the adjustment required for me to get used to the slower speed.  Fortunately, with each visit, I’ve learned to lessen the time needed to get into that relaxed state of mind that works best in Anguilla. Once I’ve done that, I can enjoy things like the fact that in AXA, when driving, someone honking their car horn at you is not an angry “Get out of my way!” or “Go faster!”  message as it would likely be at home. Instead, it’s just a way of them saying hello or a friendly heads-up that they’re going to pass you. Imagine that!

Of course, the downside of this slower pace is that, if you ever really want to get something done on a deadline, you might run into some issues depending on how the people you interact with operate.

For me, as a visitor, it’s just easier to accept that things are going to move slowly in Anguilla and not necessarily according to any particular plan. Everything is definitely much more enjoyable that way.

2. The friendliness of Anguillians

In my experience, the locals that I’ve met on Anguilla have been overwhelmingly kind and open. It makes me a little sad to say that it’s rare for me to find the same level of friendliness at home but this quality of Anguillans definitely warms my heart whenever I visit.  It’s possible that their friendliness is just a consequence of the fact that many locals work in the hospitality industry, but to me, it seems far too genuine and from-the-heart for that to be the only reason.  The vast majority of people that I’ve met on the island seem to be truly interested in hearing about me and in sharing about themselves.

Some of my most enjoyable memories on Anguilla have come after walking into a new restaurant alone, sitting at the bar to have my meal, and chatting for hours with locals that I had never met before. I’ve found that it’s pretty easy to strike up conversations with most people on the island as long as you’re polite and kind to them. Anguillians seem willing to treat you as well as you treat them and, many times, better than you deserve if you’re one of those rude visitors. (You know who you are.)

One (very sweet) young Anguillian woman that I met on this last trip assured me that “bad seeds” definitely do exist on the island, which is only realistic. Luckily, for those of us passing through, they seem to be few and far between.

I think that things at home usually move too fast for this level of friendliness with strangers to occur too often, so when I get frustrated about that fact, it’s great to know that a friendly place like Anguilla exists.

3. The lack of anonymity

Anguilla is only 35 square miles in size so it’s not hard to believe that it’s the kind of place where just about everyone seems to know everyone else. If they don’t know you personally, they probably have at least seen you or they know of your family.

If you’re just a one-time visitor to the island this close-knit community feeling might not make itself so apparent to you. However, if you’re a repeat visitor, you’ll likely soon find out that different people that you meet are connected in certain ways and, after some time, people might start remembering you.

Now, this doesn’t just happen with people you’ve met and talked to, but even people who have just seen you around.  At home in the DC area, I can go months or more without ever accidentally bumping into someone I know. There are just too many people and it’s easy to get lost in the crowd and feel pretty anonymous.

So when I’m in Anguilla and someone that I don’t know comes over and greets me, you might think it would be a little disconcerting. But, since this has so far only happened to me with friendly and gracious Anguillians, well… I have to admit that I kinda like it. It’s a nice feeling to not feel like a complete stranger in a crowd sometimes, if that makes any sense.

Just on this last trip, a guy emerged from somewhere within a packed Pumphouse crowd on a Thursday night, gave me a big smile and came over to greet me with a charming Anguillian-style guy-girl handshake (see this post for my earlier description of this common AXA hello).  He said “Do you remember me?” and my stomach dropped a little because I honestly did not remember him. Embarrassed, I apologized that I didn’t recognize him, but he was very kind and forgiving and said, “Don’t you remember? We were having dinner in the same group at Smokey’s that one time.” and he proceeded to name the people that we had been dining with. My mind was racing to remember the night, and I finally did recall the evening – but it had happened two years earlier!  This gentleman and I had never actually been introduced and I don’t believe we even spoke much to each other, if at all.

I praised him for his amazing memory and again apologized profusely for mine being so bad.  He didn’t hold it against me at all but said that it was nice to see me again and that he hoped that I was having a nice trip. The funny thing is that I ran into him again on my last day in Anguilla as I was arriving at the Blowing Point Ferry. You can be as sure as heck that I remembered him this time, and instead of getting the relatively formal handshake, he gave me a great big hug along with several well-wishes for my trip home. I guess that makes us friends. :)

The obvious drawback to this lack of anonymity is that people always seem to know what you’re doing and where you’re doing it. Also on this latest trip,  a buddy of mine said  “Oh, yeah, my friend’s brother told me he saw you at the Pumphouse last night at 1 am”. Huh? Wow. I don’t know his friend and, while I have met the friend’s brother (it took some digging for me to find out his identity), it was only a very brief meeting on a completely different day and at another location. I know, though, that this comment wasn’t meant with any ill intent and that it was really just something said in passing. It’s the kind of thing that happens pretty often in a small-town atmosphere. I learned early on that this just means that I have to behave myself at all times when on Anguilla – not that I wouldn’t anyway. No, I mean it! You don’t believe me? Why, what exactly have you heard? Umm…never mind. On second thought, don’t answer that.

Anguilla provides balance

Life at home isn’t perfect, but it is good. I consider myself very lucky to be able to visit a place like Anguilla that can provide me some balance when I feel like something is missing in my everyday life. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t pretend to believe that everything in Anguilla is perfect either, but to be able to have both kinds of places play significant parts in my life helps to keep me happy and (arguably) sane.

So, until I win the lottery and am able to have my own home in a place like Anguilla, I’ll have to settle for shorter visits and the knowledge that a temporary escape is only a short plane ride away. Works for me. For now.

My excitement over planning my next AXA trip prompted me to look back through my journal notes of my last trip (in June 2010),  just to try and recapture some of the the pure happiness that I always feel when I’m there.  While reminiscing about my adventures, I was reminded that I’ve never really posted much about what I do when I’m in Anguilla.  I guess part of me is worried about revealing too much personal information, but I suppose that can always be creatively obscured while still being able to tell a story, right?  After all, isn’t that the basic idea of what blogging is all about? Telling my story?

Sometimes, I also worry that my interest in Anguilla is too different from most, and I assume that people won’t care so much about what little ‘ol me does when I’m gallivanting around doing things like snapping pictures of local livestock. (Once, an Anguillian woman actually pulled up in a car next to me when I was taking a photo of a horse and said “You takin’ a picture of my brother’s horse? HaHaHAHAHAH! Go ahead then!”, then she shook her head while grinning ear-to-ear and drove away.)  See, my focus is not so much on the grand resorts (although I have been fortunate enough to stay in one) or even the fabulous restaurants (of which I have tried a good number), but more on the local people who have become my good friends and the experiences I have with them. Anyone, who has been to AXA can likely relate to that feeling though, so my assumption is probably misguided.

Plus, I find that I really want to tell my stories, and I’m now thinking that I can do it without revealing too much and without outing the locals who are crazy enough to hang out with me.  After all, what’s the point of having a blog if you can’t write about your experiences, right? Seems silly, I know.

So, even though it’s been seven months since my last trip (better late than never right?), I’m going to go ahead and start with June 2010 Anguilla Trip: Day One.

Actually, my good friends let me know that they were expecting a child and asked me to be a godmother during my last visit to AXA in June.  I was honored to accept, but I was sworn to secrecy since they hadn’t yet told everyone the news…and since I’m well aware of how fast word can travel on a small island, I kept my mouth tightly shut.

Today, however, they got official word about the sex of their baby and let me know that they’re no longer keeping the pregnancy a secret. So now, I get to blab the wonderful news to the world and revel in the fact that my new godchild will be born  in just a few short months!

And you know what that means, right? Yep! Another trip is in the works for when my friends are ready to show off their new little one! (If I can wait that long…)  And many more after that! :)

Rendezvous Bay June 2010

Well, I made it back to Anguilla! I had a pretty smooth travel day yesterday and was so excited to arrive back on my favorite island once again. Ahhh, island bliss…

You may or may not have noticed that I’ve been neglecting this blog a bit in the past few months. That’s been mostly because life at home has been pretty busy and there have been just too many distractions keeping me away. Apologies to those of you who were hoping for more posts recently, but “real life” has a frustrating way of making me cast aside things that I truly care about for things that “just have to get done”.

Luckily, though, I’ve had this trip back to AXA planned for several months, so I’ve been looking forward to it for quite a while.  This vacation comes at a time when I’m in desperate need of rest and relaxation just as we all could use from time to time. I’m fortunate enough to have a pretty good life at home, but as I mentioned before, my priorities tend to get a bit jumbled in the madness that is my everyday life.

So, I’m kind of looking at this Anguilla vacation as a time for me to relax and refocus myself a bit. The openness, kindness, and easygoing nature of Anguillians always inspires me to appreciate and find happiness in the most basic things in life. I hope to not only carry this energy and attitude back home again this time, but also to do a better job at not losing sight of what I always learn with every return visit to Anguilla: that simple things in life are truly the most valuable.

I hope to be tweeting throughout most of my trip, so feel free to follow me at http://www.twitter.com/cariborbust.

More updates coming soon! I promise! :)

So, in an attempt to explore someplace new,  I’ve been trying to book a trip to the Out Islands of the Bahamas for a little over a month now, but I have been spectacularly unsuccessful. I initially wanted to go at the end of February, but the day that that finally decided to book my flight, air fares went up several hundred dollars over just the day before, blowing the budget that I had planned for that short trip.  I chalked that up to having just waited too long and decided to keep an eye on fares for a while to see if they would go down. They didn’t.

I finally decided that I wanted to go badly enough that I was willing to pay the higher fares.  Plus, I had found the perfect time at the end of April where my schedule was open enough for me to travel.  (Yes, I know I would probably have better luck if I planned trips a bit more in advance, but unfortunately, that isn’t always possible for me.) So, I went online again to book a flight.

I did a search on Travelocity, and at least 10 different American Airlines flights appeared from the DC area to and from my intended Bahamian destination, the best including only one stop in Miami both ways.  Perfect! I chose the most convenient departing and return flights, and clicked the button at the bottom of the page to continue the process of purchasing the tickets. However, I was then presented with a message on the following page saying that these flights were  “no longer available”.  Hmm. Interesting.  I tried the search again and the same flight options appeared.  Why would they be showing me flights if they weren’t actually available?  Was it just a glitch in the system? I selected the same flights again and upon clicking the “Continue” button, I was once again informed that these flights were no longer available. I went back and chose different flights. Same result.  I tried the search on Expedia. Similar results: I could choose the flights but I couldn’t actually purchase the tickets.

So I decided to go to the American Airlines website to try the search there.  The same flights showed up but no matter what combination of departing and return options I chose, I got a “This feature is not available now.” message when trying to go forward and purchase the tickets.

Perplexed,  I called American Airlines customer support to see if they could help me figure out what the problem was.  I gave the customer service representative the exact parameters that I used and she executed the same search on her computer.  When her search completed,  she said “I’m not showing any return flights from that location for those dates.”.  Whaaat?  I saw them right there on my screen! What was she talking about?  I started over at AA.com’s home page and repeated the search again… and she was right.  All of the return flights were suddenly gone!  She then put me on hold to go “check with the international desk”, and while she was away, I did the search one more time and this time, the departing flights had disappeared too!

I was completely bewildered.  I understand that flights are cancelled all the time, but it was still unbelievable for it to happen kind of real-time in front of my eyes for 20 flight options to/from my specific destination and, as I found out when the AA rep came back on the line, this was a problem only for my selected dates of travel! She told me that AA had likely cancelled those flights due to the fact that they didn’t look like they’d be “profitable” and that flights were available should I decide to travel one week before or after the dates I had initially selected! The flights hadn’t just sold out either (All 20 of them… at the same time…). As far as she could see, the flights did not exist.

What are the odds of all of this happening?  I guess it’s possible that the changes had been made a while before but just hadn’t filtered all the way through to Travelocty or Expedia yet.  But what about the changes appearing on AA’s website at exactly the same time I was trying to buy the tickets?  I accepted that that was still possible even if it was extremely unlikely. (In case you’re wondering, the flights are nowhere to be found now on any of the sites, so it doesn’t seem to have been a temporary computer problem. And for you fellow geeks out there – my cache clears every time I close my browser, so I was not looking at old search results.)

After I hung up with the American Airlines rep (who was very kind during our entire conversation, by the way) I tried searches to neighboring airports and islands which would have required me taking 4+ hour ferry rides or something similarly inconvenient.  With those, I got as far as entering my credit card number (three times!) before being told that my request could not be processed at that time.  (I bet you’re not even believing that all of this could possibly have happened, are you? I promise you that it did…and it was aggravating.) There were other convoluted itineraries that would have gotten me to my destination, but they all required things like three stops in both directions or paying over $600 for the round-trip airfare. No thanks.

So what would you take away from this kind of experience? That this trip just wasn’t meant to be?  Eventually, that’s the conclusion that I came to, but I still didn’t understand why. Defeated, I gave up and shook my fist at the sky asking why, why, whyyyyyyyyy was this happening?

You might understand why I was disappointed and a little depressed after all of this, and in that state I decided that it would just be best for me to shut down the computer and go to sleep. Just after a quick check of my e-mail of course…

After I logged into my email account, I found that, within the last 15 minutes, I had received an e-mail from a super-fabulous woman that I met during my last visit to Anguilla. She lives there with her family and was kind and generous enough to invite me to hang out with them a couple of times on my last trip.  In her email, she provided me with some information that I had asked her for a little while ago, but the truly magic words came at the very end of the message:  She and her family would be traveling soon, and if I happened to be in Anguilla at that time, she  was inviting me to stay at her house while they were away!!!

Unbelievable, right? As far as I’m concerned, my question as to why I had encountered all of those unlikely problems booking my Bahamas trip had been unequivocally answered.  If I had succeeded in booking that other trip, I most likely wouldn’t have been able to take advantage of this generous offer. So this was my answer. This was why.

In an instant, what I had seen as unbelievable bad luck had transformed into the most fortunate series of completely unlikely events. I’m just not supposed to go anywhere else yet and maybe another trip to Anguilla is just more meant-to-be right now.  Is there any other conclusion that can be taken from all of this? In my mind, no.

Now the plans for this next Anguilla trip aren’t 100% solidified yet, but I don’t really see any way for me to turn this offer down, do you?  If all works out well, I’d like to buy my plane ticket within the next week.  Please keep your fingers crossed that planning for this trip goes better than my last attempt.

So, it looks like another trip to AXA within the next few months is officially in the works! (I feel so lucky!)  Stay tuned for updates.

Well, I hope that you can forgive me for not getting to any other islands just yet.  I am absolutely not complaining about getting to go to Anguilla again, but at this rate, I may have to change the name of this site to “Anguilla Obsessions”!

One of the things that has bothered me about living in a large metropolitan area is how impersonal life can be here.  People avoid making eye contact with each other in public places, coworkers and neighbors seem unable or unwilling to exchange even simple greetings, and you can be completely ignored even if you’re holding a door open for someone. Many seem to have begun to favor interacting in more indirect ways such as meeting people online as opposed to in person, texting instead of talking, and doing everything from banking to buying groceries on the web so that contact with other humans is minimal.  I feel like we’re losing our social skills and our ability to interact with other people that we don’t know and, increasingly, even with those that we do know.

In Anguilla, though, I get a whole different vibe.  If you’re open to it, it isn’t unusual to be engaged into a friendly conversation just about anywhere you go on the island.  It’s a place where I feel like every new person I meet has the potential to become a life-long friend because of the warmth and genuineness that is so common among Anguillians.  I like seeing how two guys who are friends will often greet each other with fist-bumps even if no words are exchanged.  I love how guys will greet their female friends with a handshake – not the formal lets-do-business kind, but the warmer gentleman-about-to-kiss-the-back-of-a-lady’s-hand-but-not-actually-kissing-it kind. If you’re lucky enough to build strong friendships in AXA, I think you’ll find that Anguillian hugs are among the best in the world. :)

I don’t want to give the impression that things like texting and online communications don’t exist in Anguilla, but they just don’t seem to have taken over there as much as they have at home.  (Not yet, anyway…) It’s just a comfort to me to know that a place with such genuine warmth exists and it gives me hope that I can still find it even at home but it just may take a bit more effort to find it here.

Another thing about visiting Anguilla is that it always reminds me how to enjoy the simple things in life.  It’s a place where I’ve found perfect happiness sitting under a palm tree or at a beach bar, talking with friends about anything and nothing for hours at a time. It’s a place where my biggest laughs came while enjoying a delicious home-cooked meal with those that I consider to be my Anguillian family.   It’s not that I can’t enjoy these same kinds of activities at home, but with all of the distractions that surround us here and everyone’s crazy-busy schedules, it’s easy to forget that these simple pleasures are possible.

My experiences of the “simple life” in AXA also make me realize how much stuff I own and that I really don’t need most of it to be happy.  So, whenever I return from Anguilla, I’m always inspired to simplify my lifestyle more and more so that I can depend on fewer material items and superficial ideas to bring me happiness.   Just identifying and getting rid of unnecessary “junk” in my life is therapeutic and liberating in so many ways.

Anguilla is an amazing place and my love for it grows every time I visit.  I do know that I’m very lucky to live the life that I have and I don’t mean to sound unappreciative of what I’ve got.  I know that if I should ever be so lucky as to move to a place like Anguilla, I’ll miss some of the things that I have access to now so I try not to take anything for granted.  I like that Anguilla opens my mind and that it has taught me to see my life from a different perspective.  The important thing, now, is to not allow myself to forget what I’ve learned because it’s easy to fall back into old bad habits in a world where simplicity is not the rule.  If suppose that if I find myself beginning to forget, though, that’s a good reason to start planning my next trip to AXA!  :)

I’m so excited to see my good friends and I’m looking forward to meeting some new people too!

I’m not sure if I’ll be posting on this blog while I’m away, but I’ll definitely try to get to it.  I will, at least, be tweeting every once in a while so feel free to follow me at http://www.twitter.com/cariborbust.

Sorry for the short and, probably, incoherent post.  I’m exhausted and need to get some sleep!  I’m hoping my travel day goes smoothly tomorrow, so keep your fingers crossed for me!  :)

Meads Bay, Anguilla

The official countdown has begun and I’m beyond excited!  The first couple of weeks of November have actually gone by pretty quickly for me, so December should be here in no time.  All of my transportation and lodging arrangements have been made and I’ve begun thinking about what I need to pack.

I’m very much looking forward to seeing the good friends that I’ve met on past trips again.  That’ll be the best part, I’m sure, but daydreams of which of Anguilla’s 33 beaches I’ll be lounging on and what fun new people I’ll meet have also begun invading my mind.  Despite the fact that the island is only around 35 square miles in size, there’s still quite a lot of it that I haven’t seen so I think there will be plenty of exploring done on this trip.

On both of my previous trips to Anguilla, I had planned on doing a lot of sitting around and doing nothing, but I don’t remember doing much of that.  My first trip was only five days long and the second trip was jam-packed with Carnival activities, so there just always seemed to be something to do.  This time, there are no big events going on, that I’m aware of, so maybe this will be a quieter trip.  Maybe.  But probably not!  :)  Either way,  I’m sure I’ll have more fun than I deserve to have!

Be sure to follow me on Twitter at http://www.twitter.com/caribOrBust as I’ll do my best to post my planning and on-island adventures there.